For my post this week, I’m going to start out by being honest – I have always been a little judgmental. When I first meet someone, I think, hmmmm…this person is X, Y, or Z. This isn’t because I’m a huge asshole; it’s just how I compartmentalize people in my mind. Call it judgmental…or maybe call it a human condition? I think a lot of people are the same way because people like boxes. They like to fit others into groups and define them because the unknown can, frankly, be kind of scary. And really, throughout our lives we are fed cookie cutter images of “people” and their labels by the media – girl, boy, jock, cheerleader, geek, marching band nerd, punk, the cool kid…this awkward list of high school labels could go on and on. It’s really not that surprising that we would give others these shallow labels when the labels themselves are crammed down our throats, and we are taught that they are legitimate ways to categorize people.
That being said, since coming to college I have opened up a lot, with the knowledge that people are people – they can’t necessarily be labeled or stereotyped because they are in a certain group or like doing certain activities. For example, like many others, I was one who wanted to stay far away from sororities (at first) because I had heard that the women in them were catty, “bought their friends”, or didn’t care about anything but parties and drinking. Obviously those assumptions were really wrong, which I came to realize when I met some really great women who, aha! just happened to be in sororities themselves!
You may be wondering where this is all going.
Well, I’ve also realized that sometimes, there are those that fit a stereotype. Those are the unfortunate few who make a bad name for the rest of a group. I found a good (but terrible, really) example of a person like this. In keeping with the Greek theme – let’s talk about frats…what do we automatically think of when we hear the word frats? Drinking, polo shirts, ray bands and money, maybe? Sure, if we are being shallow and stereotype-y. I know plenty of really nice guys who are in frats. My own father was in sig ep, and although he has his moments, he’s a pretty good guy. No big deal.
This guy, however, is a bad one…or maybe just an unbelievably ignorant one…or, well shit, maybe both. As a top member of his fraternity Phi Kappa Tau at Georgia Tech, he sent out an email to his brothers on how to “lure rapebait” at parties. No, you did not read that incorrectly…rapebait. His email describes the process of getting women into bed at parties – what to do, when to do it, and if all else fails, provide these women with more alcohol and get them on the dance floor! He goes into the “7 Es of Hooking Up” (you’ll love this) – encounter, engage, escalate, erection, excavate, ejaculate, expunge. So basically, scope a woman out, fuck her, and then kick her out of your room…and if you are interrupted at any point in the process just shove more alcohol down her throat. He then signs his letter “In luring rapebait, Petersen”.
Great. Well, I don’t know about you, but I think this is obviously problematic for a couple of reasons. The first is that this idiot describes these women as rapebait, later says “NO RAPING” in his email…and then signs his email “in luring rapebait”. So you don’t want these fraternity members to rape women…but you are calling them rapebait, if I’m not mistaken. He also outlines a lot of highly aggressive pickup techniques in his email, some of which could, frankly, be perceived as straight up sexual harassment. What the hell made this dude think that this email was funny or a good idea? Is he stupid? Or just an honest-to-goodness asshole? Either way, his entire email can be clearly defined as a contribution to rape culture.
The other main problem that I saw within this email was right at the very beginning, when the guy clearly states in all caps that any member or pledge who is seen NOT harassing women is going to be kicked out of the party. So basically, harassing women means you get to continue being at the party and hanging out with your friends. That is so ludicrous that I almost choked when I read it. Fraternities are supposed to be places that guys go to bond with other guys, make connections, and grow up into our country’s business leaders, politicians…presidents…historically, at least. I don’t want the possible future leaders of this country anywhere near someone who describes women as rapebait, plain and simple.
Do you think that this was maybe a joke that got out of hand? Or is this guy genuinely just an asshole? Either way, his careless description of women as rapebait was completely unacceptable and contributive to rape culture. Let me know what you think!
so glad you covered this! I read this and was so shocked I honestly wasn’t sure how to react because it was SO absurd. Have you looked at his apology letter?
This is absolutely disgusting, and as a Greek member horribly embarrassing. As someone in Greek life we all have our letters, and they’re supposed to mean something, some formal code as to the way that we live our lives most deal with honor, respect, loyalty, growth, integrity, etc. You are supposed to uphold those letters with your every word and action THAT’S what it means to be Greek not about the socials, t-shirts, or whatever. It is because of the oaths that we make to our letters that a Fraternity House should be one of the safest places a women could be because they have pledged loyalty to those standards. This is not just disrespectful to women, but to their letters and founders. What I found most disgusting is the final comment of “House business should stay House business” aca-scuse me? That’s what you have to say? Not that this is horribly degrading to women, promotes rape culture, or makes you all look like total assholes, but that it should have been kept a secret? Makes me scared to know what else they’ve kept as “House business”.