Reality TV is known for edited scenes, pushed storylines and of course, lots of drama. But, these shows involve real people and real relationships. As entertaining as the scandals are, the gender dynamics behind them unfortunately mirror real life. Vanderpump Rules, beneath the screaming fights and SUR uniforms, shows what you can’t fake: sexism.
If you haven’t fallen down the Bravo rabbit hole, Vanderpump Rules follows a messy friend group that works at SUR, a restaurant in LA owned by Lisa Vanderpump.
I’m sure you’ve heard the gender stereotype that surrounds media and everyday life claiming that women are “too emotional.” When conflict occurs, and women strongly react to betrayal, their reaction is considered the problem rather than the behavior that caused it.Vanderpump Rules is a prime example of this stereotype. The audience, the media, and even authority figures on the show also reinforce a broader pattern of misogyny that exists far beyond reality TV.
In season 1, Jax Taylor cheated on his girlfriend of 3 years, Stassi Schroeder. For months, Jax denied the cheating allegations. Instead of supporting Stassi, the group questioned her upset reaction, suggested she should stay with him and fully believed him. She was framed as dramatic and was isolated from the group for months. But the truth always comes out, Stassi was right all along and the group still rallied around Jax.
Throughout the show, the women question the men’s behavior, they are labeled emotional, dramatic, and crazy. Women on the cast got the nicknames “Crazy Kristen” and “Tequila Katie.” By attaching these labels to the women, producers subtly tell the audience how to interpret their behavior. Instead of focusing on the actions that prompted their reactions, the narrative centers on whether the women themselves are unstable.
Lisa Vanderpump, authority figure on the show, refers to the male cast members as “naughty boys,” framing cheating and dishonesty as childish mistakes, (they’re in their 30s btw). Even when the men would get arrested or disrespected restaurant owners, Lisa brushed it off like they are just immature. Her language with the men excused their behavior, but she would encourage the women to stop punishing the men and move on.
Despite years of scandals and drama, Tom Sandoval and Tom Schwartz were offered a business partnership with Lisa when she opened a bar TomTom. Tom Schwartz only worked 20 minutes of a shift at Lisa’s restaurant Pump and quit when he was too stressed. The opportunity was never offered to any of her women employees who have worked for Lisa for decades. Shouldn’t the female mentor of the show be supporting women and giving them business opportunities too?
Another example involves Kristen Doute, yes “crazy Kristen.” Tom Sandoval cheated on her after 6 years of dating. After the breakup, Kristen was convinced he had cheated again but this time on his new girlfriend Ariana Madix. Kristen brought a woman known as “Miami Girl” to SUR to confront him. The group framed this interaction as proof that Kristen was an obsessed ex girlfriend and completely lost control. They completely disregarded the allegations.
Shocker, she was right. Years later, Sandoval admitted that the “Miami Girl” accusation was truthful. Fans who are rewatching the show are identifying more and more with Kristen, feeling like they wrongfully judged her.
7 seasons later, the most famous scandal of the show “Scandoval”. Tom Sandoval was cheating on Ariana after 9 years together with her best friend and fellow cast member Rachel Leviss.
Rachel stepped away from the show entirely, changed her name and went to get mental health treatment after the intense backlash. Ariana got lots of public support and grew lots of fame. However, Lisa encouraged the cast to be compassionate to Tom and ultimately betray Ariana. Lala Kent and Sheena Shay other cast members claimed Ariana shouldn’t become a “god” or “beyonce” for getting cheated on, completely minimizing a woman for being empowered and having public support. Sandoval, on the other hand, has continued appearing on television and rebuilding his public image. The difference highlights how scandals in reality television often lead to harsher and more lasting consequences for women than for the men involved. If Tom is allowed “redemption arcs”, shouldn’t Rachel too?
These dynamics exist beyond reality television and are seen constantly in real life. Research found in the Harvard Kennedy School shows that women who express anger are often judged more harshly than men displaying the same emotions. Women are more likely to be perceived as difficult or unprofessional, while men expressing anger are often seen as confident or decisive.
Looking at Vanderpump Rules through a feminist lens reveals how easily women’s credibility is dismissed, while men’s harmful behavior is minimized, excused, or even rewarded. And that may be the most “real” part of reality TV.
What does it say about our culture that audiences so easily accept misogynistic narratives that undermine women’s credibility?
Featured Image: View this post on Instagram: A post shared by Vanderpump Rules (@pumprulesbravo)