Sharing Meaning & Orgasms: the Language of Sex

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What, WHAT! Welcome back to another semester of ShoutOut!

As always, thank you for being readers and supporters, or even challengers, to us bloggers! All of it makes us stronger!

Recently, a friend sent me the link OMGyes.com and I haven’t stopped thinking about it. How revolutionary to have researchers diving deeper into something we know so little about. No, I’m not talking about the Mariana Trench, or Big Foot – I’m talking about female orgasms, ejaculation, stimulation… the whole deal.

OMGyes is broadening our horizons on what we know about pleasure. What does that mean in a greater societal scope? People with vaginas are about to have exponentially better sex than ever before. OMGyes is not the only group to thank for this, but this movement toward unapologetic, unfiltered sex education for women is a game changer.

At first when I started dabbling in the field of sex education, my thinking was limited to informing on safety, consent, protection, and health. Although all of those things are vitally important in conversations about sex, limiting education to only such items – topics that often strike fear in our uteruses – doesn’t paint an ultra appealing picture for women and sex in the first place.

It took years for me to feel liberated in my sexual freedom, and even still I often slip into hesitation. Some communities and groups of people that I enter make me unsure of my freedom, and some policies and politicians are real threats to such. Muting and downplaying the importance of sexual liberation, especially from wxmen – as a traditionally muted group in general – hinders our ability to reach our fullest potential. A shift away from our current sexual education’s restrictions (formal or informal) allows us to step out of our societal boundaries and take charge of ourselves better.

OMGYes is such a revolutionary concept not just because of challenging traditional connotations with gender and sex, but also because they’ve taken it into their own hands to make it a legitimate study. My favorite major goal of this project is to create common meaning when it comes to talking about sex. For example, we know how to use a recipe when cooking because we know what it means to sauté, or whisk, or combine one cup of this with two tablespoons of that… But when it comes to sex, our vocabulary is very, very limited, and paints broad brush strokes at best. With limited vocabulary comes limited shared meaning. If we don’t have the words to describe what we want, it is almost impossible for us to expect to get what we want.

Combining a heightened vocabulary for technicalities, and confidence in asking for what we want, leads to more enriching, empowering, and overall pleasurable sex. You deserve that. So – let’s talk about pleasure! Let’s talk about technique. Let’s take control of our sexual selves (if you choose to do so).