It had to be her smile; peculiar in its power. The power to silence a hundred chattering voices while invoking an authentic curiosity. The people around me became obstacles through which I had to tactfully maneuver so as to not divert my attention from the smile. “Hey.” All I had to offer.
Over two years later that smile affects me daily. It’s the background on my phone. It’s the theme of a hundred beautiful dreams. It’s comfort after hurt. It’s the peaceful melody incessantly playing in my alleviated mind. I love this smile. More so, I am recklessly in love with the girl who wields the smile. And this is why.
My girl’s phone passcode is Beyonce’s birthday. My girl regards CiCi’s pizza as heaven on earth. My girl couldn’t live without pajamas or pop tarts. My girl broke her toe trying to flush a toilet. My girl bought me an otter in the pacific ocean. My girl shops in my closet. She stashes cheese its in her bed. My girl cries at the sight of a husky. My girl knows how to relax. She knows how to laugh. My girl knows how to hug and hold. She knows how to affirm and encourage. My girl’s voice coerces hearts into growing open ears. God, she can sing. My girl has ambition. Not only can she dream, but she can access internal determination that will undoubtedly lead to those dreams orchestrating into reality. My girl cares. Her spirit feels for those in pain and those who hurt. My girl accepts people and sees them as worthy of affection. My girl is fiercely loyal. She is zealously committed to those she loves. The most attractive characteristic of my girl, the one that trumps all the others, my girl knows with an undying certainty who she is. She is secure, she is confident and she is courageous. She’s a fighter. She’s passionate, driven and independent. All with a gentle and quiet spirit of humility.
I love this girl. I love that she has become one of my closest friends and companions over the last couple years. I love her constant support, concern and care for my well-being. I love that we have struggled, fought and continue to fight for our relationship. I love what she has taught me. Speak only that which is true. Love is a decision that must be considered deeply, not simply felt. Love necessitates sacrifice. Love does not condone petty behavior nor does it allow for one to fester in their weakness. Rather, it unconditionally accepts you for your faults and walks by your side, through the mud and the mire, to bring into fruition the person you have the potential to become. Love moves. It thrusts you into a whirlwind of self-reflection and forges a profound motivation to become a more beautiful human.
I have always wanted to see the world; climb mountains, sail across oceans, explore ancient ruins, camp in a tent suspending a hundred feet in the air, eat foods I didn’t think were edible. Adventure has forever been my most innate desire. It evokes awe and wonder in my eager heart. No mountain, no sea, no tree bequeaths the fullness of adventure found in love. Adventure is in people not places. Exploring the caverns of her character, permeating into the tranquil waters of her identity, wandering through the wondrous wilderness that is her personality, and fixing my eyes on the breathtaking beauty of those captivating colorful eyes offers an indescribable and ultimately sufficient state of wonder in my ever-expanding heart. She is my adventure. She is my focus.
Love is not a fog-filled emotion, it’s the vast visibility of an open ocean.
Happy Birthday Love.