A breach of trust

I find it hard to believe that the average female hasn’t felt the least bit mentally and emotionally bamboozled in the process of rejecting a male while being pursued half-heartedly. To give some context, over the past weekend a girlfriend of mine visited for my pre-birthday celebration. While potting the cacti she had bought as an early gift, she inquired about whether I had watched a Tik-Tok she’d sent me. The contents of the short video brought up feelings we’d both thought we’d buried deep down into no-man’s land. The video showed a male and a female playing the role of friends, hanging out after what seemed to be a while.  

The male friend casually makes a discussion, breaching the topic of having broken up with his girlfriend. As I continued to watch I began to call out his next actions as well as the girls ALL too well.

He sat on the bed.  

She put her legs under the covers.  

He’s next to her. 

She’s confused while he continues to brush aside the moves he’s making on his friend.

She plays it off to mediate the awkward tension.  

He leans in, then she vocalizes her confusion and rejects his advancements.  

I don’t find it embarrassing to say that as a female who has had friends of the male sex, this has happened WAY too often. I begin to wonder how much of a regular occurrence this is. I know that just the same occurrences may have happened to many of us. As I watched the remainder of the Tik-Tok, my expression turned from appearing humored, to neutral, and then upset. A feeling of annoyance washed over me by the fact that I experienced such a thing word for word, action for action. It drove me crazy to the point where my friend apologized for accidentally triggering me.  

This makes me wonder, how many of us young females and women get psychological whiplash because the male species desire to test non-disclosed romantic or intimate limits? Within the confines of defined friendships built on trust, a slow pattern of questioning the intentions and motives behind future relationships begins to develop. I cannot say that I can speak for most females on this matter. I do not mean to offend my fellow women, but I would like to pose the question of whether this situation has occurred in your life. Has it led to the development of mistrust, whether with others, or maybe even the distinction of your own feelings towards another person of romantic interest? Some food for thought.


TikTok. (n.d.). Thegracewilson 🤍 on TikTok. TikTok. Retrieved September 23, 2022, from https://www.tiktok.com/@thegracewilson/video/7132927282489888043?_t=8VZYJvzIYBO&_r=1

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