Degrassi Keeps it Real!

***Trigger Warning***

After reading lfleetwood’s post, I was compelled to further talk about the topic of putting responsibility on women for protecting herself when in actuality there are some things you cannot control. While thinking about this topic I stumbled upon an old episode of Degrassi, back from the early 2000’s to see the similarities and differences between how her rape was communicated to the way rape is discussed today. To my surprise and quite sadly really nothing has changed. Though Degrassi is a fictional Canadian show it hits on some pretty real topics and one of them being when the one of the main characters is raped at a party.

            The blame that Paige places on herself after the incident is somewhat heartbreaking. She states, “I dressed like a slut and went up to the room with Dean, so it is my fault.” When I watched this it instantly made me think of lfleetwood’s post about the underwear and how our society has made us think that at the end of the day the woman are to blame because they didn’t take all of the necessary precautions. I loved lfleetwood’s rebuttal, “First and foremost, I do not believe locking your underwear down makes you any less safe from rape. No matter how strong the fabric is, if someone wants to take advantage of you, they will.” This really hints to the fact that nothing excuses a rape, no matter what the woman is wearing or in Paige’s situation her decision to go up to the room. Once someone says no, that is a very clear message directing someone to stop and a weird boy short version of a chastity belt cannot change that fact.

            Other parts of this Degrassi episode that made me cringe is when Paige had to see her attacker at a basketball game. He confronted her by saying, “We had fun didn’t we?” Dean was completely oblivious to what he did wrong and even blamed Paige, saying that she wanted it to happen. This victim blaming is still presented in our society today and frankly I am so sick of it! What is it going to take to make lfleetwood’s proposals about education a reality? What is it going to take for people to stop making rape jokes? What is it going to take for people to start caring about the victim, what she or he needs, instead of making the perpetrator innocent? I really do not know, but by reading the other blogs on ShoutOut I sense that there is a wanting for change, but where do we start. Maybe it starts with the ending of the blame game and more of an in depth knowledge of a victim’s struggle so he or she can be a survivor in a society that will not say well you could have done something.

A poem to express my feelings:

I wonder if I’m crazy

because I didn’t scream

or shout.                                 

I did say that I didn’t want it to happen

but I let it happen.

My body feeling some sick pleasure

as my heart and mind were breaking simultaneously

A whirlwind of tactile experiences.

I wonder if I’m crazy

cause I want to tell people.

They’ll say

You wanted it

You enjoyed it

If you didn’t

You would have fought screamed

There were others in the other room

You would have done something.

I wonder if I’m crazy

cause I think all their words are bullshit

and no one knows what your feeling unless you tell them.

And no one has the right to judge you because you aren’t the

quote on quote victim that is always presented in those mind numbing statistics.

I wonder if I’m crazy

Because I don’t even hate the person who did this.

Some may envy him because he’s great at persuasion, taking over as the mind rushes and left

wondering well what was that?

I wonder if I’m crazy

because it took so long to realize this was wrong.

I just wonder…….

All this talk about date rape, legitimate rape,

to me if you say no then you are entitled to what you feel and

forget all of these labels trying to lessen the significance of forced bodies upon one another.

I wonder if people will believe this narrative or deem it foolish talk.

I wonder if I will go mad constantly questioning the opinions of others.

I wonder if any of us will one day find peace with this craziness.