In my experience, your experience playing video games as a woman has many variables. If you play certain types of games, typically shooters, your experience is likely to be unenjoyable. However, if you play “cozy” games- like Stardew Valley or The Sims- your experience is likely to be very pleasant. Most games that I find have a largely female audience also happen to be mainly single player games, such as Animal Crossing, The Sims, Stardew Valley, or Life is Strange. Most of the games that can lead to uncomfortable experiences for women are typically shooters or specifically hero shooters, such as Call of Duty, Fortnite, Valorant, Overwatch, Battlefield, or Rainbow Six Siege.
In my personal experience as a woman who plays shooters, your experience can be make or break depending on many factors. One factor is if you choose to speak using in-game voice chat. If there are a lot of men in the game and you choose to give call outs in voice chat, they will either berate you for simply being a woman or they will call you a cheater or accuse you of being “boosted” if you outperform them. Another variable that makes or breaks your experience is your username. Although it should not impact what your username is in games, if you choose a “girly” name then you will likely be pestered and peppered with different variations of “are you a girl?” until you answer or leave the game. Additionally, in some games, the character you choose to play can make or break your experience.
A lot of women (myself included) tend to gravitate towards “healer” type characters because a lot of their abilities are focused less on gunplay which allows for a less stressful experience. For example, the characters Mercy in Overwatch 2, Sage in Valorant, or Lifeline in Apex Legends. I know that I have had experiences playing Overwatch 2 and Valorant specifically that have been extremely unpleasant because I have been berated by men that say extremely sexist things to me. When simply giving a call out to help the team, men notice a feminine voice and immediately begin to say things about how I should get back to the kitchen where I belong, or saying that I should let my boyfriend get back on “his game” because he can do better than me. In extreme cases, I have had disgusting things said to me regarding sexual acts and just incredibly inappropriate things that should not be spoken to anyone, regardless of your gender. I have been yelled at for not performing to the standards of my male teammates, even when I do the best on the team.
However, it is important to not allow this type of behavior to discount your gaming experience and enjoyment and not allow it to ruin your overall thoughts of the game. I have had so many enjoyable experiences with random people in games that easily outweigh the negative experiences. Additionally, I am lucky enough to have friends that play games with me and this makes for an even more enjoyable experience. While it feels like there is an increasing amount of sexism in shooters, it is also easy to ignore the hatred from others. Sometimes, I simply leave the voice-chat if they are speaking in game chat, or I turn off my text chat if it becomes too hard to simply ignore it. While it is unfortunate that many women have to deal with unrelenting hatred in video games, it is important to persevere and not give them any attention, because that is all they aim to do.
ShoutOut! James Madison University 