Bisexuality, Musicians, Dilemmas, Questions

I once heard a joke from one of my gay guy friends who said, “Bisexuals, they’re just greedy!” Well, I thought it was funny at least.

To play off a post from last semester on Rihanna’s music video
“Te Amo,” I want to explore a little of what bisexuality actually is. Because there I have encountered quite a number of people who don’t “understand.” I once didn’t understand myself.  My cousin and her boyfriend told me over dinner last week they believe everyone is at least somewhat bisexual.  There is a spectrum and a person falls either closer to heterosexual or homosexual.  But who knows, you decide.

I remember an old classmate of mine explaining her feelings of being bisexual. It’s simple really, one is attracted to the person.  The connection is with the person, not their sex; person first, gender and sex second.

Now, I fully got what my former classmate was saying when she first explained her feelings, but I’ve explained it to other individuals and they don’t get it.  They feel you must be attracted to one sex or the other.   Certainly not both.

And so I ask two questions, the first.

Homosexual or heterosexual, why no in-between?  Why does most of society say we have to be attracted to one or the other?   So now every human can only be attracted to one sex?  Of course partiarchy comes into play, and quite frankly, I believe bisexuality confuses patriarchy.  As if bisexuals are double-agents.  Patriarchy doesn’t know what side a bisexual person is on.

The second, and here is the double-standard, in favor of males.  Why is it more acceptable  for women to be bisexual but not men?  Because you and I both know it’s a taboo for men to be bisexual.

I’ve heard several times that a girl would rather have their boyfriend cheat on them with another girl than another guy.  I’ve also heard several times though a guy would rather have his girlfriend cheat on them with a girl than another guy.  In fact, that might not even be cheating.  I digress,  cheating is cheating, whether with a guy or a girl.

This brings me to Rihanna’s S&M video.

Here Rihanna is clearly acting as if she’s indeed bisexual. Whether or not that is true is still to be determined. I believe she’s straight and she’s simply exploiting the Queer community once again to sell her music. As seen with Rihanna, Lady Gaga, Madonna, etc. they all play up their bisexuality. I can’t think on the top of my head any male music performers who are bisexual and “allowed” to express their sexuality. Dave Matthews is bisexual, never have heard or seen him write on that. Even gay male musicians must twist their lyrics to fit a heterosexual role i.e. Melissa Etheridge, Moby, or Elton John.

Here’s another question, why is it that those female musicians who I will claim are straight such as Rihanna or Madonna, allowed to showcase same sex relations, but truly gay, out of the closet musicians, must remain sexually neutral in their lyrics and videos? The answer is obvious, to not place a barrier between themselves and the heterosexual community. To have a bigger demographic of consumers. And artists such as Rihanna is doing exactly opposite. She’s expanding her potential consumer pool by playing the bisexual card, though that card is possibly misleading.