A Submissive Temper

Today was my third visit to the Chevrolet dealership to fix the steering in my car.  After waiting for an hour, the man comes out and says, “They sent us the wrong part.  Your gonna have to come back.”  A fury built up inside me, I was tired of claiming Chevrolet as my second home.  So I let him have it… in a civil manner.

Today was also my third visit in one week to Verizon to get my phone fixed.  They had given me a refurbished phone, stating this one would work better than the last.  And it didn’t.  Unfortunately, my visit to Verizon was simultaneously after Chevrolet, needless to say, I was pissed.  I agreed to Verizon’s terms by signing in, but consequentially I stormed a Verizon employee for help.  I said, “This is my third visit since Sunday that I had to come in for this phone.  Quite frankly, this is a shit product.  I have friends who have the same phone and say the same thing.  I know this Capitalist Corporation won’t give me a new, better, and different phone, but these guaranteed quality, pre-owned phones are worthless!  I don’t want to have to wait an hour in line for the fourth time for the same issue.”  This young, if I may say fine, man walked with me over to the Technical Service and said “Have a peace of my gum, it’ll calm you down.”

As I stand there,chewing Extra bubble gum, we chatted briefly about his move from Detroit to Harrisonburg.  He said he has been having a hard time making friends since moving here.  I asked him why.  He said, “I don’t know. Probably because I am black.”  I said, “Yeah, probably.  And that is ignorant on their part.”  He said, “I don’t really mind it because at least they fear me.”  I said, “But you don’t want others to fear you, you want them to love you.”  He pondered.

I then told him, “So, how do you think you would have reacted if a man came in, in the same anger as I did over the same issue with his phone?  How would you have reacted?  I bet you would have reacted immediately assertive and tried instantly to empathize with his fury.  You would have agreed with that man and reaffirmed his anger.  Instead, since I am a woman, you thought I was crazy.   You had to sympathize with and pity me.”  He said, “No, no.  I wouldn’t have acted that way towards a man, and I don’t think you’re crazy.”  I said, “Sure you don’t, now that you have talked with me.  But that is after the fact.   However, with a man you would have right off the bat agreed and pleaded with his anger.  You see how different minorities are treated.”  He pondered.

So, here is the double-standard.  If I get angry, I am a crazy, short bitch who others must pity.  If a man gets angry, well, he’s a man, it’s normal.  I lose my womanhood while he gains his manhood.  I am not quiet therefore I am not served.  He is not quiet and everyone turns their heads in order to assist him.